The list · Port Ellery and the harbor counties
Harbor Counties, in our own words
Everyone who said yes to our public list, in the order they said it. Each entry is that person’s own page, parsed when they said yes, with their verification level beside their name. There is no score and no sorting.
The charter
A community for people who practice consensual non-monogamy, or are learning to, in the harbor counties. Friends first, dating when both people want it. Describe how you practice in your own words. Nothing here tells anyone who you are dating.
- Curators
- Lux Moreno Signed in with OAuth
Søren Aalto Signed in with OAuth - Who can see it
- PublicAnyone who reads the Pool
- How people join
universal-opt-in. Organizers add no one; each person says yes §5.1.- Block lists
- Kindling’s own, and the Circular consortium’s §7.3.
- Status
active· updated 23 September 2026
The manifest: pools/harbor-counties.json
Your place here
You are looking as Dev Kapoor Signed in with OAuth, a member, in this example.
One action, any time. It takes effect in under a minute §5.3.
On the list
People, in the order they said yes
7 people. This list never shows what other Pools anyone is in, even our own.
said yes2 Nov 2025
Lux Morenothey/them
Signed in with OAuthOrganizer at Many Moons. Runs the monthly social and the new-to-this workshop. Polyamorous for twelve years and still learning.
non-monogamydatingcommunitycuratingOrganizer, and the primary curator of this Pool.
said yes2 Nov 2025
Søren Aaltohe/him
Signed in with OAuthCo-organizer. Solo poly, a teacher, and the person who remembers everyone’s name at the social.
non-monogamysolo-polydatingcommunitycuratingOrganizer, and a curator of this Pool.
said yes10 Jan 2026
Tamsin Reyesshe/her
Email verifiedNesting partner to Gabe, partner to Anouk. Garden designer. Happy to be listed as part of our household; ask either of them how that went.
non-monogamyfriendshipsaid yes10 Jan 2026
Gabe Morrowhe/him
Signed in with OAuthParamedic. Nesting partner to Tamsin. Open to dating; my partners know my page and I know theirs.
non-monogamydatingsaid yes14 Feb 2026
Anouk Vissershe/her
Email verifiedPartner to Tamsin, friend to Gabe, metamour to a very good cat. Translator from Dutch. Here for friends first.
non-monogamyfriendshipsaid yes21 Mar 2026
Dev Kapoorhe/they
Signed in with OAuthSoftware tester. Relationship anarchist. I would rather describe what I want with each person than pick a label for it.
non-monogamydatingfriendshiprelationship-anarchysaid yes19 Jul 2026
Mae Castellanoshe/they
Signed in with OAuthDrummer. Jazz on weeknights, punk on weekends, whatever you need on Friday. Keeps sticks in the car.
drumssubbanddatingMae’s page is about drumming, and that is what this list shows. Nobody here has to explain how they practice before they are welcome.
Pages are shown as text. Photos, if anyone has them, stay on their own pages §2.5.
Ask the list
A plain question
A question over the list’s file. Only people who said yes are in it, so only they can come up. It looks for your words in each person’s own words and tags; it does not guess, and it does not rank. Answers appear in the order people said yes.
Nothing was sent. This is an example, answered in this page from the manifest.
- Dev KapoorSigned in with OAuth
Software tester. Relationship anarchist. I would rather describe what I want with each person than pick a label for it.
People, not a ranking
A vouch counts here, and only here
When someone cannot or would rather not verify by email or OAuth, Lux or Søren can vouch for them, because they know them. That vouch is local to this Pool §4.4: it counts on this list and nowhere else. Today nobody here is vouched for; everyone signed in with email or OAuth, and it says so beside each name §4.5.
Here is the gap, plainly. In Kindling v0.1 only a curator can vouch. Tamsin knows Gabe better than anyone on this list, and she cannot vouch for him here, because she does not curate it. Partners and metamours are often the people who know each other best. The Orchard Street Household works around it by making every member a curator of their own household Pool. How that works, and its limit. We think this deserves an RFC; our notes toward one.
Where a vouch from Lux would count
- Harbor Counties · where Lux or Søren vouched
- Solo Poly Supper Club · Søren curates it, and would have to vouch there himself
- The Orchard Street Household · only its own three curators can vouch there
- Any Pool on another site · a vouch never leaves the Pool it was made in
Who can write to whom
Each person’s rules, checked
Each row is checked in this page against the recipient’s own preferences and the list’s two block lists, the way a compliant client would §7.
| Who writes | Result | Rule | Why |
|---|---|---|---|
| Dev writes to Gabe, through Harbor Counties | Delivered | §7.2 pool-mates-only | Gabe takes messages from people in a Pool with him, and they are both in this one. |
| Dev writes to Gabe, through the Solo Poly Supper Club | Held back | §7.2 pool-mates-only | Gabe takes messages only from people in a Pool with him, and he is not in the Solo Poly Supper Club, so it cannot carry a first message to him. |
| Rafa, email verified and not listed yet, writes to Lux | Delivered | §7.1 | Lux takes messages from any verified sender, so newcomers can reach the organizers. |
| Someone unverified writes to Lux | Held back | §7.1 | Unverified senders are held back. Verify your email first. |
| bulk-intros@relay.example writes to Gabe | Blocked | §7.3 | The sender is on a block list this Pool subscribes to: The Circular consortium block list (spam). |
| A handshake request from listed-them-anyway@mail.example | Refused | §7.3 | That identity is on The Circular consortium block list (consent_violation): “Submitted other people’s pages, a whole household’s among them, to Pools without asking any of them.” Nothing from it reaches anyone here. |
Our other public Pool
Solo Poly Supper Club
For people who practice non-monogamy without a nesting partner. A supper on the second Sunday and a list of people who get it. Friendship first.
Kept by Søren Aalto Signed in with OAuth · Public · pools/solo-poly-supper.json
On it
- Søren AaltoSigned in with OAuth
- Dev KapoorSigned in with OAuth